Seriously, though. I got an MRI on my (broken? sprained?) ankle this morning, and didn't know what to expect. I have broken only one bone (my nose- not technically a bone- another fun story) but I've never needed anything beyond an x-ray.
Imagine my surprise when the technician offered me a pillow, a blanket and put earplugs in my ears. I thought this was like a glorified x-ray, what's with all the props? Magnetic Resonance Imaging, right? Magnets sound harmless enough... And they are, I suppose. But they're certainly not quiet.
When she walked out, the room got very quiet and there was a slight brush of air as the machine whooshed on. Then clicking, clanking, a strange light from far inside the cavernous machine. It pulled me closer, slowly, with a low humming that was slightly unnerving, and once my lower half was in the small tube, the real noise started. Looking up, I saw a small digital clock that would count down, each time the little pieces inside were settling. Then the machine would fire up like a loud steam engine and I got this funny tingling sensation in my legs-- I swear I could feel those magnets!
And the clock would countdown- first from 6 minues. Then more noise from inside the machine, more shifting and clicking, and a new clock would appear. Sometimes it was 3 minutes, sometimes 2, sometimes 6. And I found myself in the peculiar situation of feeling afraid. As more and more time passed, an unusual fear crept in.
I'm not claustrophobic and I don't get squeamish at the sight of blood. Horror movies don't give me nightmares and I consider myself to be something of a "badass" (and a sweetheart- that's what a psychic told me once, that I'm a badass and a sweetheart). But as time passed- as I laid there alone with the loud machine, I started to think about the people that were there getting MRIs for cancer (the MRI/PET scan center happenned to be attached to a cancer treatment center), and I started to imagine what they must feel like. The fear, the anxiety, the prayers. This is definitely a room where many people before me have prayed to the God of their choice and begged for healing. And this morning I was no different from them, as I laid there and prayed for good news. Please God, no broken bones. Please God, no surgery. Thank you God, for all the blessings in my life.
And then I started to REALLY freak out- just left alone there with my thoughts and the loud noises- and I started thinking, "What if this is something serious? What if that's why my foot won't get better? What if they find something weird that I can't afford to fix? What if I need surgery?" And as I started to totally freak out, I in turn tried to calm myself by counting sheep and doing some deep breathing. I tried to imagine something besides my foot, and all of a sudden it dawned on me...
this machine sounds like an alien spaceship. If I was abducted and examined by the greys or the blues, this is exactly what I would imagine it being like. Alone, in a cold dark room, being scanned by an uncomfortable machine, with nothing but the strange noises and my own thoughts. And my imagination started to run away from me, as I pictured skinny little ETs on the other side of the glass. I envisioned the lights of the machine being the lights of the ship, and
Then, a touch on my shoulder and I jerked awake from my daydream, half expecting to see an alien there! But instead, the technician- holding my shoe and smiling. I got up, checked out, gave them $400 (ouch) and told them all to have a fantastic day.
And that was my MRI experience this morning.
